My lessons in authenticity – Lesson 1
Over the next few days, I will share my personal lessons around becoming more authentic.
I recall an incident from my consulting days. After closing a critical project, I asked my team for candid feedback on what I could have done differently.
I scheduled one-on-one meetings with each of the 5 members, so they can freely speak up. I received nice feedback: how they enjoyed working with me, appreciated my guidance and so on.
However, one person had the courage to share honest feedback. He paused, thought for a bit and said, “You do all the thinking for us. You ask us to share our thoughts, but it’s clear you already have everything planned out. After a few minutes, you take over with your famous handwritten notes or slides, and we just… stop talking. It doesn’t feel like our ideas matter.”
I remember feeling an immediate rush of defensiveness. I thought, “What am I supposed to do if no one else prepares? Someone has to think things through, right?” I was frustrated. Thankfully, I didn’t say anything and heard him.
Once my emotions settled, I realized he had a point. Maybe they weren’t bringing ideas to the table because they knew I had already filled that space. My habit of over-preparing was actually holding my team back from thinking.
🪴 🪴 Authenticity Lesson 1: Listen genuinely to the feedback your team shares. It’s not easy for people to give their manager constructive feedback. So when they do, try to understand, and make it a chance to grow.
Do you find it difficult to accept constructive feedback, specially from juniors / team members?
Stay tuned for Lesson 2
Perspectives 